So it's been just over a week since last writing and in that time I've had to deal with the hardest of temptations for me - too much chocolate in the house to ignore. Need I say more? The easter bunny came and while I know he left the smallest chocolate bunnies available, they still had to be eaten and I couldn't possibly let Jack eat them all..that'd just be bad parenting, not to mention just plain painful to have him on such a long-lasting chocolate high! I have to admit, I sort of gave in, and have been slowly (well, slowly for me) snacking through the chocolate. I just seem to have very little self control when it comes to chocolate and the more I try and avoid it, the more my mind obsesses over it, thinking more and more about what's still left in the cupboard and it doesn't stop until there's none left. Well it's gone now, so I now have a much better chance of getting on with things. Jen made a good suggestion a while back, which was to never buy bad food to keep in house, but if you really really want it, then you have to go out and make a big effort to go and find it. If it's 9pm and I'm lying on the couch watching television, it's a far greater hassle to get out into the car and drive to the nearest shop for ice cream than to walk to the freezer in the kitchen. So that's the plan now that there are no more bunnies or eggs in the house.
After training last Thursday I had a quick chat with Jen about ways to help keep me on track. She recommended getting back to writing a food diary for a few weeks, and making notes of what training I'm doing in terms of time spent, distances travelled, laps swum etc. So I've just completed a week of the food diary and it's amazing to see what goes into my mouth...and to see what I would add in if I wasn't paying attention or having to write it all down! What I've found most obvious is that I definitely crave sugar, I angst for something sweet after dinner, and that I desperately need suggestions for healthy snacks, particularly protein snacks. Ideas are most welcome please.
Last week I made a mention of kilograms lost, which I actually feel a bit funny about. I guess the thing that bothers me is that I haven't had scales in the house or paid too much attention to my weight for a good 10 years or so as I've felt under control, in reasonable shape and I hate obsessing over kilograms. I just don't believe it's healthy to obsess over your body too much, unless of course there are serious health issues. The reason I got into training with Jen was for my state of mind, to get back to feeling physically strong and energised, and to bring exercise back to being a regular and normal part of my life, not just to lose kilos - that would come as a result and as a bonus of doing the work. So in terms of my state of mind, physical strength and energy, I feel a thousand times better and more resilient emotionally. I have finally started running again after years, without feeling like my hips joints are going to break apart or like my back is aching for me to stop. All the specific strengthening exercises in BBB training are helping amazingly and it's so exciting to know I have the capability to be fit and strong again.
Why I've brought this up is due to the fact that on the scales I've remained the same for the last 2 or 3 weeks and it's annoyed me - annoyed me that I haven't lost more weight and annoyed me that I'm checking my weight so frequently (weekly) after years of not doing so. SO, rather than obsessing over scales and getting drastic about eating and exercising, I've focused on the goals that I have achieved, as well as the fact that scales don't paint the whole picture. I'm due to have another body composition scan next week, so that'll tell me a bit more about what's going on physically. The most important thing for me is how I feel, which is great, so I'm happy. I'm getting addicted to exercise and it no longer seems like a chore, but rather, a reward after a day of looking after the kids & doing house work....a reward that I'm taking as often as possible!!